**SPOILER ALERT** The two hour series finale of Desperate Housewives aired last night. I had high expectations for a television show that held my otherwise short attention span for 8 solid seasons. Unfortunately I found myself less glued to the tube on my last visit to Wisteria Lane.
First off, when this show traditionally has an unusually long time between commercial breaks, I once timed the first one as 15 minutes after the opening credits, I was greatly disappointed that there seemed to be one every 5 minutes. I even tweeted that the show seemed to have been stretched two hours simply for advertisements.
Secondly, the finale was choc full of what I saw as trite storylines and rip offs of former television farewells. For instance, though the juxtaposition of Karen McCluskey’s death and the birth of Julie Meyer’s baby was poignant, it was anything but original. In my head I started hearing Live’s Lightning Crashes as the scene played out. However, being the sap that I am, I did shed a few tears as Gaby danced with her daughters and Bree sobbed in the arms of Tripp ( and who didn’t see that coming?) Which is my next problem, the predictability was ridiculous. Could there have been at least one surprise? I confess, I did not see McCluskey’s confession coming, but according to what was trending on my Facebook many people did. I was a little disappointed.
I thought there would be a final scene of all the women in lock up (oh wait that’s how Seinfeld ended) or the show would end as it had started with a suicide and Bree would join Mary Alice. Morbid I know, but definitely different and shocking.
How about Roy talking to Tom? I had wished my husband had been watching that speech,as it was very sweet, but if you didn’t see that cheesy reunion of Tom and Lynette coming after that then you may be a few french fries short of a Happy Meal, if you get my drift.
The second hour was ridiculously planned around a wedding of two late coming characters, one of which I couldn’t stand in the first place (Renee’). After 8 seasons there probably should have been more focus on the lives of the four core women and less on a stupid limo ride with a predictable water breaking on Renee’s wedding dress. The rush to tie up all the loose ends in the final half hour most certainly had to be felt by more than just me. I had figured out by that time that all of the women would relocate. It seemed that it was all on their terms too.
For a brief moment I thought Tom might have gotten back his balls when, in probably the most unpredictable moment of the show he pointed out that Lynette could never be truly satisfied with her life. However, as usual, he opted to stick to the old adage “Happy wife, happy life” and gave in once again. Perhaps his best choice because her endeavors always seem more successful anyway.
The last 10 minutes played out a little like the end of Six Feet Under, minus showing us how the characters meet their demise, however the interesting twist was all the ghosts of Wisteria Lane making a comeback. Even Dixie Carter, or her look alike (hologram?) who passed away in 2010 shortly after he stint as Orson’s mother. All I could think of was how many people died on that street and how smart the ladies of WL were to get out of there before they ended up like the others, or like whatever was in that box that Susan’s home buyer had.
And so, in a race to wrap up a show that could have easily lasted another season, Marc Cherry missed his mark. I give the 2 hour series finale of Desperate Housewives a B-, and that is only because the rest of the season was an A+.