We’re back in Miami for episode two which begins with Romain and Joanna having breakfast. First he bought her a new Jag, and in this scene he tells her he’s buying them a new house. Then he springs the prenup on her. Nice job, first ply with gifts, then talk possible divorce. Joanna says she’ll talk to Lea and then decide. Okey doke, since when is Lea an attorney?
Meanwhile, Alexia and Marysol take a run in three layers of fluorescent clothing…and full makeup and jewelry. They discuss Mama Elsa‘s health, which is not good at this point. They talk about Frankie’s progress. Alexia tells Marysol not to give up hope.
Adriana and Frederic still are not speaking a few days after the boat argument. He apologizes for calling off their wedding four years ago, which Adri is still harboring bad feelings over. Adri tells us that the reporter who broke the story about her actual marriage is a close friend of Lea’s. This is definitely a little suspicious. Adri tells Frederic that she is willing to let Lea “clean the air” for the sake of the boys.
Lisa and a newly rejuvenated Daysy continue with their usual silliness. Lisa takes photos of Daysy in a sexy maid costume. Hilarious! They talk about the ongoing battle surrounding the new Star Island house she and Lenny have purchased. In Miami Beach, if something has what they deem as historical significance, you can’t tear it down. The new and improved Daysy has decided to leave Lisa and start her own cleaning service.
Alexia’s designer Javier and his assistant arrive to help her reorganize her closet. Drink every time this guy says “baby”. He’s supposed to be helping her clean the closet but keeps bringing in more stuff to decorate it. I don’t know about you, but I don’t need mirrored columns blocking my clothes.
Meanwhile in the design district, Adri meets with her wedding planner. They discuss what she wants, which she says is “arriving in Heaven, angels flying, like a dream”. Eww, I’m picturing flying Cupids. She wants to arrive on a gondola, have bungee jumpers, and a blimp. Seriously? Oh and Mr. Wedding Planner, you’ve got a whole six weeks to plan it!
Lisa and Lenny arrive at the new house which is huge but really needs a lot of work. Apparently though, they got the go ahead to tear it down. The house is filthy and Lisa balks at a roach she says is the biggest roach she’s ever seen. I find that hard to believe considering we live in the tropics, there are huge bugs everywhere. The house is a pit and needs to be bulldozed, there is nothing historical about it except the appliances. Lenny brings her a sledgehammer and hard hat and tells her to go for it. Lisa, always adorable, swings the hammer in her Louboutins and falls.
Adri, Marysol and Alexia head out to shop for wedding gowns while Lea and Lisa are shopping for wedding shoes. Lisa arrives at the shoe store, Capretto, right in my hood, and the three discuss Romain’s request for a prenup. Lisa says that of course she signed one, if it made Lenny comfortable, why not? Lea tells them she has no prenup because when she and Roy met, they were equally as successful. Now I grew up here and Roy Black had been a successful Miami attorney for years already when they met. What did Lea do that made her equally as successful? Rumor here is she was actually a secretary, if what she says is true she must have been a very well paid secretary. Joanna is still undecided about the prenup. Both groups talk about Lea and Adri’s issues with each other. I’ve decided that Adriana is the Brazilian Teresa. She murders English sayings. In this scene the “Adri-isms” include “they won’t stab me ON the back”, talking about Alexia and Marysol, and my personal favorite “Lea is throwing stones, like she has no glass roof “.
Adri arrives at Lea’s house in a cab. That’s right, a YELLOW cab. I don’t know anyone who actually takes cabs places here, unless they’re drunk. Seriously, everything is really spread out. Adri’s first mistake was agreeing to meet Lea on her turf. They hug hello, Lea gives her a (phony) compliment and Adri tells Lea that her car broke down, which explains the cab. They then have a very confusing conversation about whether or not Adri is actually married. I still have no idea. Lea apparently has gotten her legal degree the same way I got mine; (It’s called the Doctorate of “I’m married to an attorney, let me give you legal advice”) Adri pleads her case, Lea swears she didn’t leak the story, Adri tells her she’s been a “wicked sister”. Lea claims she helped Adri under the pretense that she was a single struggling mom, all along being a married woman. Adri refutes this saying that the minute Frederic came on the scene, Lea stopped helping her. Lea then says she got $350,000 donated for her son’s school tuition. What school costs this much? Did Adri not pay for a decade or something? Wouldn’t the school have kicked her out? Anyway, to me it felt like they were making it up as they were going along. Adri says “Have a merry life with all your riches” and storms out, into the rain, calling a cab. Lea comes over with an umbrella, by the way, Adri had her own umbrella when she walked in (did Freda misplace it?). Lea tells her to come back in and get warm, Adri says no and the episode ends.
Next week: The fight continues, Lisa and Lenny struggle with fertility issues, and Alexia and Lea have a sit down.