RHONJ Season 5 Ep 15 “Zen Things I Hate About You”

The "Gorga switch" is flipped. Credit: Bravotv.com

The “Gorga switch” is flipped. Credit: Bravotv.com

It’s the third episode at Miraval, and I don’t know about you, but I hope it’s the last one. We start with the explosive ending and then are rewound to see how it got to another Joey Gorga outburst.

The road to crisis begins with a ritual…not the peace pipe, but the peace panty. In what clearly has to be another classic Teresaism mix up, Teresa presents Melissa with a pair of peace sign decorated panties. Just what Mel wants for her birthday. Teresa interrupts what could have been a morning or Gorgasms to present her odd present.

Richie, Kathy and Rosie are walking the desert. They are discussing the previous day when they had their horse therapy session. Rosie is still reeling from the emotional event and Kathy is still trying to convince everyone to let her voice be heard.

Caro and Al act like the Greek chorus in this episode, complete with robes. Together at the spa they comment and contemplate on everyone and everything that has happened. Like all the other Jersey Housewife trips Caro has a migraine. While Al is with Caroline the rest of the men are at the pool being obnoxious and chasing other guests away.

The women play tennis, and it’s occurring to me that either Jac is suddenly missing or being unusually quiet. As they play we cut back and forth to Greek chorus Caroline who is analyzing both Melissa and Teresa. She is still convinced they are the same exact person, and the more we see them whine and complain throughout every activity the more correct that analysis becomes.

Everybody is then ready for the next group therapy activity which consists of getting up onto a 30 foot highwire in pairs. To stay on the wire the duos must support one another by leaning into each other. This is certainly not an activity I’d want to do with somebody who doesn’t like me. Joey goes up first and Tre immediately wants to be his partner. After they succeed for about four steps Tre continuously shouts that she wants Melissa up on the wire. Finally Melissa takes the bait. They walk the wire and say they will never fight again, but, as Caro points out, they’d have to be up on a wire for the rest of their lives.

Later on it is time  for Melissa’s birthday celebration…or the dinner where the wine glass hits the fan. The first sign that things are about to fall apart are with Mel’s birthday toast. She thanks everybody being there…new friends and old. She mentions specific names and details about what makes their friendship special, however, there is no morsel of anything thrown Tre’s way, and from the look on Tre’s face she has definitely noticed the intentional or unintentional “snub” as Caroline points out in her side interview.

In front of everybody Caroline points out that so far the trip has just been a “band aid” and together with Al she rips it right off. Mel, Joey, and Tre are now free to discuss the elephant in the room. This time the elephant is Penny. Joey is still not convinced that Tre has nothing to do with Penny or the rumors that have been spread by her and Jan. When Tre says she won’t fix it, because she feels it really doesn’t involve her, Joey loses it and throws a glass. Mel pulls him out of the room, calls him an “idiot” and reprimands him for losing control. Instead of telling Joey to control himself they all, including Juicy, turn on Tre and beg her to confront Penny. Tre agrees and the trip ends on a high note.

Next week: Jac confronts her fear of public speaking and Mel confronts Penny.


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