Hundred Thousand Dollar Listing and Guess Who’s (Maybe) Moving To Beverly Hills

Taylor and John back on TV?                                          Photo: E!Online

By Tara Cushing (@TheBravoBlonde)

Here’s a recipe for you:

Take Ryan Serhant , transgender him, place him in the suburbs and knock down the price of sale to what typically is chump change on Million Dollar Listing New York.

Welcome to my life. For the past year I have dealt with strangers, many inconsiderate, traipsing their dirty shoes through my house at all inconvenient hours only to tear it (and my hope and pride) apart. Until finally somebody saw what I see (at a much reduced price from what I paid) and gave me the opportunity to be an inconsiderate stranger dragging my dirty shoes through somebody else’s price inflated house.

Welcome to the reality of the real estate game. It’s not glamorous. It’s tedious, disheartening, emotional, expensive and very messy. Luckily, I have crossed many hurdles and can see the light (or the wires hanging from the spot where my chandelier once hung that I will have to replace) at the end of the tunnel.

It’s been a long road, but hopefully the bank will see that I am trustworthy, honest, and not laundering drug money (yeah they really suspect everybody of that these days) and soon I will have my upsized new home (and the bills that come with it).

Until that day my life is in chaos, which is why I have not been on my A game with this blog. I am good with optimism, I am good with finding the humor in the darkest of situations, but I SUCK at compartmentalizing my feelings. Like many writers I wear my heart on my sleeve, and the feeling that I have the hardest time suppressing is that of anxiety (my friends over at Skinnygirl cocktails sometimes help me with that one). So, alas, I have found it nearly impossible to focus on ANYTHING  but making this move happen (that and helping my friends over at nikscreations.com with their social media campaign). I do plan on being very inspired once all is said and done, however, as my new abode has the perfect spot just for me to sit and write. Oh think of the interior decorating I will do…and write about!

Speaking of new abodes here’s a little niblet just for you all as I don’t believe ANYBODY else in the loop has heard this one yet. A reliable source has told me that Taylor Armstrong and hubby John Bluher (Couples Therapy-Season 4) are in talks to return to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills:

“Taylor is living in Scottsdale (AZ) for now but is moving,” our source says. “(She) is going back to RHOBH. No one knows yet. They’re looking for a home in Beverly Hills.”

Where did our source hear this little nugget? Why from Mr. and Mrs. Bluher themselves. So would you like to see Taylor back as a 90210 Housewife? Tell us your thoughts below!

Until then, happy house-hunting Taylor and John. Welcome to my world.

July Raves

1 purity cleansing wipes from Philosophy 2 Pet Odor Exterminator Candle Mulberry & Spice Scent 3 Shark Navigator vacuum cleaner 4 Lucky Brand strapless cotton romper 5 Puddle Jumper life jacket 6 Skinnygirl Cocktails White Cranberry Cosmo

By Tara Cushing @TheBravoBlonde

The lazy days of summer are finally upon us, but some things just need to get done. Here are my current favorite things that make what we must do this summer a little easier to accomplish:

One thing I confess to being lazy about is skincare. By the time I am able to shut down for the evening I’m too exhausted to do the whole washing routine. My first rave is for lazy face washers like me everywhere. In May I raved about Philosophy body wash, this month it’s their purity one-step facial cleansing cloths. They are a tad bit pricey ($15 for a 30 count package), but they get the job done. I’ve tried cheaper brands and even regular baby wipes, but they dried out my skin and left me looking like Tammy Faye (Bakker) Messner after a good cry. I purchased my purity wipes at Sephora, but they are also available at Philosophy ‘s website. Try them and never wake up with makeup stains on your pillow again.

Summer brings with it certain smells. The honeysuckle in the breeze, the brine of the ocean, the stench of your pet on a humid day. Recently I had an issue with this and was mortified when a house guest (ok home shopper) noticed a “strong dog odor” in my home. I went so psycho over the whole thing that I dumped an entire can of freshening powder on my carpets and broke a vacuum cleaner that was less than a year old trying to suck it up. We had to rent the industrial vac from Home Depot and buy a whole new vacuum (see next rave) after the debacle. In the end my house still smelled like the dog (turns out it was him, not the carpets). When grooming didn’t even help I turned to my local pet supply store and that is where I found the Pet Odor Exterminator Candle. They offer a 100% money back guarantee if it doesn’t work…it works. It works so well, in fact, that my realtor commented “The place smells amazing”and my house even sold! You can find the candle on Amazon. I recommend the Mulberry & Spice scent.

After I broke my vacuum I was faced with having to buy a new one for the second time in less than a year. Not wanting to spend a ton this time I looked for a less expensive brand. I’d heard many people rave about their Shark brand vacuums, including my mother. I got a Shark Navigator at Bed Bath & Beyond for about $130 with my coupon and it is THE BEST VACUUM I’VE EVER OWNED. I don’t know whether I should be excited or terrified by the amount of dirt this thing sucks up and it’s got such power it needs minimal push. Even better it comes apart and has a fabulous attachment for doing the stairs, upholstery, and the car interior. Now if you really really want to be lazy you could spring the big bucks for a Roomba, but, don’t let my husband read this, vacuuming with my Shark is kind of fun…almost.

Now that it’s hot out getting dressed is a chore, and uncomfortable. Since it’s not appropriate to be naked in most communities, one step lightweight clothes are the way to go. How to look cute when you just want to throw something on? Lucky Brand makes adorable lightweight strapless rompers with hints of lace so you can look put together, stay cool, and dress down. Perfect for the pool, beach, running errands, you will feel like you’re wearing nothing, without the risk of getting arrested. I got mine at Lord & Taylor (coupon!), but Nordstrom, Macy’s, and Bloomingdale’s also carry them (in fact Bloomies has it on sale until July 5th!).

So you want to be lazy poolside and just watch your little ones swim? You need to get them Puddle Jumper life jackets by Stearns. Unlike traditional floaties, these don’t have to be blown up. They are one piece that slide up the arms and fasten around the body, giving your child three areas of support. My kids love theirs and can spend the whole day wearing them without complaint. Kids who don’t complain are awesome. You can find them at Target and pool supply stores.

Finally, what’s the summer without a cocktail? Again, I’m lazy, I don’t want to mix my drink, hey, I’m on vacation. My favorite ready to go cocktail du jour is Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo. Made with “vodka, triple sec, and natural flavors” one serving is only 34 calories, which is awesome when you are spending your days running around half-naked in the heat. The flavor is fruity but not too sweet and seriously, who doesn’t love a Cosmo? It’s also clear in color, which is great for when you spill your drink and are too lazy to try and coerce the stain out of your strapless romper.You can order Skinnygirl White Cranberry Cosmo online (if your region allows) at Total Wine.

Will you or have your tried any of my raves? What are you raving about? Share with us, we’d love to hear from you!